today

Today I talked to you.

And I put aside my pride 

And the anger that lives inside me.

So I can talk to you, all bare and honest, in all my brokenness, just as you are.

"Bakit hinihiling mo ngayon ang bagay na ipinagkait mo at d mo binigay?" 

Didn't I give it? Didn't I stay? 
I am here, am I not? Or am I just enough?

You say we only realize things when they are gone. Maybe. Maybe not. 
Maybe your pain just clouded how you saw everything that you've forgotten. 

You say you are happier now with this situation, than the pandemic years when I thought we had us.
When we bickered and laughed. When we fought but were okay again right after.
I guess I just remember it all differently.  

Now it is finally too late. I cannot unbreak you. You are a stranger now. You have been the last few months.

And i should do nothing else but grieve.