my caterpillar, my mini-me

 My caterpillar...

My mini-me...

Time flies by so fast. Today you are 3.

Everyday you are learning a new thing. Just recently, you could speak 2-syllable-words and it feels so bittersweet. 

You still breastfeed... And you will probably won't stop until your brother does just so you could lord "MINE!" over anything he touches, including my dudu. You wrestle with him and get into fights with him, but there are moments when you seem to understand that he is a baby, and you treat him gently like the big brother you are. When you think I am not looking, I see you kiss him sweetly many times when he is sleeping so peacefully.

There were lots of times na imong kapating frustrated me, some might even say basin iuli ka sa teacher nako when you actually start going to school... But lately, I have realized, as the days go by, those kapatingan moments have become less and less. 🥲 When you could hear the angry tone of my voice from anywhere, you would be scared and cover your face to hide but still muster up the courage to walk towards me still to accept the reprimand. And then we hug all those frustrations and anger away. You are growing up indeed, my little man.

I know that there will come a day when I would give anything just to have these days back... to be able to hold you this close, to hear you call and look for me when you are upset, to see that mischievous smile of yours and that little pointer finger moving side to side while saying no-no (u got it from me 😅), to hear you demand for me to go back to the bed when u wake up in the morning... many many other moments with you I get to enjoy now. 

Life can be taxing and my days can be so busy that I sometimes ignore you and forget when I focus on something else. But I want you to remember how grateful I am to God for you and your siblings. Sometimes I wonder if all the things I have had to endure made up for my unworthiness to deserve having all of you in my life. 

You always manage to put me back together when pieces of me are falling out just by calling out 'Mama'... you bring me back to the present, here with you, where I am reminded I am loved.

Happy birthday, my love..

my caterpillar.. my mini-me.. 

my Atticus ♥️

I love you, with everything I am and more.